April 2019
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5 years and counting…..WOW

Well, it is almost here.  Our 5 year anniversary.  My husband and I were married August 21, 2004.  One of the most beautiful memories that I have.  I know that we are not even into August yet, however, I have a feeling that by August 21, I may not be able to move.  So we were talking about celebrating early so that I could enjoy it.  After reminiscing a little bit about that wonderful day, I left the room and got to thinking.  Thinking that is, about the NOT so wonderful memories that came along with the wedding.  Now I don’t mean that anything went wrong during the wedding, I mean what happened a year later.

A tradition that I grew up with knowing about wedding cakes, is that you save the top and freeze it.  You do this, so that on your 1st year anniversary you take the cake out of the freezer, thaw it, and celebrate your love with eachother once again.  Thinking back to the first year you have had together, talking about the wedding and so on.  You do this while sharing your delicious cake that neither of you probably even tasted  at the actual wedding because you were too busy talking to every Tom, Dick, and Harry!  

So anyway, we got married on Long Island, N.Y.  My husband grew up there, and he has a huge family.  It made more sense and was a lot more fun than getting married in a small farm town in Minnesota where I am from.  Because of the distance however, living in Las Vegas would make it a little bit of a challange to get my cake here.  My Mother in law assured me that it would not be an issue, and that she would get it to me no matter what!!!!

Well, a year later comes around.  My Mother in law kept up her end of the deal, and got it to me.  Boy, did she ever…..  I remember specifically calling her and reminding her weeks in advance.  I was so excited about that cake.  The way it looked, and smelled, and to think I was so close to finally tasting it.  I could hardly contain myself when she called and said that she had mailed it.  Now, I never even asked her how she mailed it because I just assummed that she would put it on ice and over night it.  Do you all agree that any sensible person, I don’t care who you are, would know that YOU SEND A CAKE OVERNIGHT!!!!!

You all must know where this is going right???  She did not send it overnight.  In fact, she sent it UPS ground.  Not red, not blue, not orange.  But GROUND!!!  Now, not only did she send it ground, but she sent it to my husbands warehouse over the weekend.  Realize this, it is August in Las Vegas.  This means 100 plus degrees in a non airconditioned warehouse.  You do the math…. 

Monday morning….the day of the unknown box.  My husband goes into work, by this time we know that the box is there after talking to his Mom.  However, he has no idea what he is about to discover.  Let’s just say that he didn’t even bring it home.  What I would have given to be a fly on the wall that morning to see his face.  When he opened the box, he literally thought that something had died in there.  The smell was bad enough, but the sight was just as bad.  Mush, just pure mush.  He said that he had never seen or smelled something so awful!   This coming from a man that lost his sense of smell years a go. 

Let’s just say that it was a very, very sad day.  There still isn’t an anniversary that goes by that I don’t think about that once beautiful cake.  At least I still have pictures, right?…..  don’t worry, I still love you Mom.

It’s sucking us in………

When my sisters and I were younger, we LOVED McDonald’s!!  Now, we rarely ever got McDonald’s.  I am very serious about this, by rarely I mean I can’t remember 5 times.  However, we still LOVED it, the smell, the taste, just the look of those golden arches.  It was magical…..  Now there was a couple reasons why we didn’t get McDonald’s.  This is highly due to the fact that as many of you know I grew up in a very clean house.  No sugar, salt, processed food, mainly just NO junk.  But the BIGGEST reason why is because my Mother was convinced that it made us giddy and unruly.  Every time that she did get it for us, we became very giggly and silly.  I believe that we were just so cotton pick-en happy to eat something with taste.  Along with the fact that we felt like a normal child who gets McyD’s every once in a while.  Who wouldn’t be ecstatic?!?!  Thinking back, I am getting a little excited right now.  Anyway, we would beg and plead to go to McDonald’s anytime we were out and about.  When we would drive by one, we would act like our car was getting “sucked in” by the golden arches.  Hence  the phrase, “help it is sucking us in”!!!!!!  The phrase worked only a few times, but it did work.  My little sister and I became SO attached to our love for McDonald’s that are dream was to live together and work at one.  That way we could have endless happy meals.  What an aspiring goal.  If any of you are curious, I never did work at a McDonald’s.  But every once in a while, the golden arches can still suck me in…….

The Jiffy Cake Bandits……

I love sweets, especially when I am pregnant!  Let’s face it, I have always had a sweet tooth.  It just seems to be exasperated when I am pregnant.  Everything tastes SO much better and has SO much more flavor.  I’m sure anyone pregnant would agree about the taste of food. 

I bring this up about sweets because I realize that a lot of my issues with loving them has to do with my childhood.  You see, I grew up in a “sugar-free” household.  I should add along with that a  “taste-free” household.  My Mother did not believe in sugar or processed food, along with salt.  Now, I need to start off by saying that because of these rues I DID learn a lot about good and bad foods.  However, moderation and deprivation are entirely two different things.  Especially when you are a small child.  I believe that all of my sisters, along with myself have food issues because of our up bringing.  A lot of emotional eating and or not eating. 

To point out what some of these rules meant, I will give you some examples.  At school, I was not allowed to have any morning or afternoon snack.  Foods like crackers, cookies, and juices.  Only fruit if it was offered.  I remember just sitting there watching everyone eat.  I also never had a “real’ birthday cake.  I remember one year my Mom made one out of honey and wheat.  OMG!  It was hard as a rock, and I swear she forgot the honey.  As my sisters and I got older, we would try to sneak any form of sugar in the house that we could.  It would be like Christmas morning when we actually found some!  Jumping up and down like we had just struck oil!  One specific memory I have is when we would go to our Grandmas house.  She had a drawer where she would hide her candy.  Little did we know that the candy was from 1910.  Literally, it practically would break your teeth.  We did find one thing that we could bring home with us though.  We thought we had hit a jackpot when we came across some Jiffy cake mix boxes.  We had a plan, when our Mom was at work we would make them.  We did, and then, so that we would never get caught, we hid them under our beds.  I have to tell you that the cake was STALE ROTTEN!!!  But we didn’t care, we finally had a real cake, some sugar, some comfort and some normality.  We felt like kids, giddy and all from all the sugar and yellow number 5.  We didn’t care that this too came from that same 1910 drawer back at my Grandma’s house.  We were in heaven!   

So you see, I feel like I have somewhat of an excuse now as to why I love sweets so much.  Especially when I am pregnant.  I am going to enjoy and live it up a little.  Hope you will join me to a nice slice of Jiffy cake.

The DREADED Red Potato Enema……

Okay, so here it is, the story some of you know, some of you are dying to hear about, and the rest of you who are just sitting there with a huge question mark above your head.  Well, as some of you may or may not know, my Mother is somewhat of an extremist.  What I mean by this is that she goes to the extreme with most everything she does, says, or believes.  Whether this be religion, health or just plain and simple trying to get her point across.  Why do I think it is important to explain the “red potato enema?” It  is because it may help some of you better understand first my Mother, and second, where I am coming from the majority of the time with relation to my childhood and constant flashbacks.  Now, there is not much involvement with explaining the memory.  Also, my recollection is somewhat foggy as I am sure I have tried to block it out numerous times.  I was about 3 years old, I remember being sick with a sore throat, fever, chills, basically the typical cold.  My Mother, (whom always seemed to come up with these crazy health remedies) suddenly had a GREAT idea!  Where she read this, or came up with this, I still to this day have NO idea.  But she thought if she gave me an enema I would get better.  It seems like it was just yesterday….she literally had to chase me around the house in order to give it to me.  I don’t recall the actual  procedure happening (thank GOD), but I do remember running like a bat out of hell to the bathroom after she gave it to me.  Now, most people are never introduced to enemas until they have reached adulthood.  But for me, my Mother made sure I Knew ALL about it before I even hit the age of 4.  I do need to add, that my Mother DID mean well.  In fact, if you ask her about it today, she will say that I was better by the morning.  I love my Mother, but sometimes she is absolutely crazy……….

Is there anything weird in this ultrasound?


The grandma we are referring to is my mom (Erika).  As many of you know my Mother is extremely religious and believes that prayer can fix ANYTHING!!!!!!  No exaggeration.  Anyway she was concerned with the size of baby C’s thumb.  She thought it looked out of proportion to the other digits.  Because of this she feared a deformity (just what an emotional pregnant daughter wants to hear, right).  So her solution was she would just pray the deformity away.  I on the other hand see absolutely nothing wrong with her fingers.  They look perfect to  me, and probably any of you who are reading this……..this is what I call just another Judism ( my mothers name).